Today (after the sleep clinic) i did a bunch of flip videos. Our dear friends Ana and Isa are in the process of creating a documentary film about international issues, cystic fibrosis, and transplantation. My mom and I have been asked to contribute some tape of us talking about our experience with transplant and CF. It is very hard to talk to the camera. I always said how I would never do reality TV, but i guess this is different. This isn't reality TV, this is truly reality. I talked about how difficult my life is, what i do in a day, what it means to be on the transplant list, and how important my sister is to me. Along with some other random ramblings...
I am having this karmic experience where i am going through the transplant process right at the time when a documentary is being made, and letting go of my own insecurities for the betterment of others is what i have to do. I have to let myself be vulnerable. I have to let myself be seen as "sick". this has always been such a big fear of mine. I never want people to view me as sick, as unable to accomplish something, as less than. But here i am. Barely able to keep up. I must be honest at this point, life is hard. I am the epitome of vulnerable. I must share it, and help others learn about it. To see why we need organ donors. Because without the knowledge and education we don't have donors, and we need people to consider the possibility of donation. If i can share my story and it will help others, it makes my participation and insecurities worth it.
1 comment:
as long as you don't act like snooki, I think you will make for a wonderful "reality tv star"! ;) I think what you said in this post is so powerful (actually your whole blog is this way) and if the sentiments you share in your blog are anything like what you are able to say to camera then you will truly have helped others. You are so brave to share your story in order to help others. Love you!
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