October

Well here we are, October, and still waiting for my transplant to happen. I know it isn't really that long, but on day 67 I look back at my time waiting. I remember sitting around the table with my family all making guesses about how long it would take to get lungs. My sister suggested not until October 3... OCTOBER 3rd? THAT IS SO FAR AWAY!!!! Well, now we are here, October 1. It hasn't been as horrible as i thought it would be. Actually, it is just like life... you live it day to day not knowing what the next day will really bring you. When I wake in the morning, i always think, will this be the day i get new lungs? One day it will be!
I honestly feel that it will happen this month. I could be totally and completely wrong, but it makes sense to me in my bones that this will be the month... so we will see.... You can call me crazy, hopeful, naive, stupid, or whatever, but it makes me feel good to have intuition, or just pure desire that this will happen soon. I know there are many others who have been waiting longer, but I feel for me, this will happen. We will see. Don't worry, I won't go claiming that I am psychic if it does happen this month, but i will be happy :)
My mom is having a hard time waiting right now, she wants to get on with her life. I don't blame her. For me, because I am "healthy" and stable right now, i don't mind waiting. But i don't want to get sicker, that would not be fun. I don't want to have to wait so long I have to go back in the hospital for a lung exacerbation. So yes, I guess i am getting antsy... but I have faith it will happen at the right time, and the day the phone rings will be the RIGHT day :) Lets just see if it is actually in OCTOBER :)